


The Boy in Confusion

by Ladyhawk_lhflu



Series: The Two Sides of the Moon [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alpha Remus Lupin, Angst, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Werewolf Biology
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-20 21:17:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20682065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ladyhawk_lhflu/pseuds/Ladyhawk_lhflu
Summary: Remus wakes the morning after his friends reveal that they know his secret. He can't understand their reaction to his other side. Why are they trying to get closer to him, instead of running the other way?





	The Boy in Confusion

Remus woke up and immediately ran for the bathroom. It was a typical morning of the moon. Throwing up and dry heaves, even before breakfast. Madame Pomfrey had tutted over him when she had witnessed this. There was no physical or magical reason for this reaction, she said. It was stressed induced. He needed to trust her and Professor Dumbledore a little more. The wolf couldn't escape the Shrieking Shack. Nobody would get hurt because he was at the school.

The medi-witch's words sounded good. But Remus didn't quite believe them. The nightmares he had the night before the full moon added to his doubt. The doubt made him panic. What if he killed someone? 

This morning was worse, because now the three people he liked the most knew his secret. So he had to prepare for their retreat. They might not tell anyone. They would probably let him stay in the dorm room. To ask for his removal would start gossip among the students. And teenagers could come up with very nasty ideas about people very quickly. Remus didn't think James, Sirius or Peter wanted to be cruel to him, at least not at the moment. But even if they let him stay, Remus knew that they would no longer be his friends soon.

He knew they had good intentions. They seemed like they wanted to help him. But something about the wolf was bound to scare them. Especially in the hours before the full moon, when Remus had the least amount of control over it. The wolf had scared his dad when he was eight. Remus hadn't ever figured out what the wolf did. He just knew that his mom helped with his preparations exclusively since that day in August. He suspected his parents had argued while the wolf was in control. Because they seemed tense with each other after that.

The wolf had been strong that day, not allowing him to see or hear anything while it was in charge. It hadn't been that way last night. He had seen his friends surrounding him. He had felt his friends *pet* him. They had known the wolf had taken over. But they hadn't run. Their actions had suggested they had tried to soothe the wolf.

Why? Remus asked himself as the dry heaves started. But he had no answer. Because he was in the wrong place to find them.

====

In the dorm room, Sirius and James were scrambling to get some towels together.

"Should they be warm or cold?" James asked as he readied his wand over the little towels Sirius had transfigured from their extra washcloths. 

"Um, warm, I think. He turned really pale before he headed to the loo." Sirius caught James' eye worriedly. "Does he go through this every month?"

James nodded. "You sleep through it most of the time. He does his best to keep quiet."

For a moment, Sirius looked like he might be sick. But James shook him quickly. "You have to go in there and help him. I'll keep watch so nobody bothers you."

Sirius slipped into the bathroom cautiously. He had three small towels draped over his arm. He listened, but couldn't tell where Remus was in the communal room. So he started down the row of stalls until he found one where two legs rested wearily on the floor.

"Moony. Remus," he called softly. "I brought you some cloths to help you clean up."

The toilet flushed, and those legs slowly moved to stand. They stumbled as the stall door swung open. So Sirius quickly reached out and caught his friend before he fell.

Luckily it was still rather early, and they were the only ones in the bathroom. That meant Sirius didn't have to make up an excuse as to why Remus looked like he had downed half a bottle of firewhiskey the night before.

It also meant that Sirius didn't have to help Remus hide the change in his eyes as the wolf took over. He could simply bow his head a little, which he did immediately.

The wolf reached out to touch one of the towels, so Sirius used it to warm the other boy's face and clean his hands. When the last of the nervous sickness was wiped away, the wolf ran a hand through the raven hair in front of him. Sirius smiled as he stayed still for a few minutes to let the wolf get his fill of the silky strands.

But when the strained gasp of worry escaped from Remus a minute later, Sirius reached out to put an arm around him. "Let's get you back to bed."

For a moment, the dark haired boy thought Remus would pull away. But as Sirius guided him back to their dorm room, he could feel the desperation with which Remus clung to his arm. James came up to them before they entered the room. "Frank came in just as you left. I told him Remus was sick," he whispered. "He's going to send for Madame Pomfrey before he heads off to breakfast. I couldn't stop him. I think the nausea potion he drank yesterday scared him a bit."

Remus looked worried, but Sirius just ran a hand down his back and eased Remus into his bed. Remus dozed as Frank gave his bed a wide berth before heading out the door to get the medi-witch.

Twenty minutes later, Madame Pomfrey took one look at the three boys surrounding Remus's bed and nodded sharply. "You know. So you should know the proper way to help him." 

There was no question in her voice. The boys didn't bother to deny it. They just waited for the lesson to begin.

Remus woke as the medi-witch waved her wand over him. Almost instantly, there was a wild look in the hazel eyes. But Madame Pomfrey just shook her head. "You know you have to eat this morning, as much as you don't want to. Have your nerves settled?"

Remus nodded. Madame Pomfrey called one of the house elves to bring the boys breakfast. Then she pressed on them the importance of Remus eating well. "He needs all the strength he can get tonight. So wait until his stomach settles, then help him get breakfast. Make sure he rests, especially later in the day. If he gets any cuts or scrapes before he comes to me, make sure I know about them. They need to heal beforehand, or they may scar. Above all, keep him calm. The night will be easier if he is less stressed."

The three boys nodded solemnly. Remus shrugged. "I'll be fine by myself. You don't have to do anything."

Sirius rolled his eyes as he took two trays from the house elf. "Spending all day hiding and worrying isn't good for you. You need a distraction, or three." He pulled his trunk to the middle of the room so he and his friends could use it as a table as they sat on the floor. 

"Schoolwork is a good distraction. It'll also keep you from being too far behind after you recover in the infirmary." Madame Pomfrey admonished Remus before heading out of the room.

James ran to the common room to check that the medi-witch left. Then he sat back down at their makeshift table and announced, "I have a great way to distract Moony."

"What?" Peter asked eagerly, looking like he needed a distraction himself. He was fine with Remus being a werewolf. But he was worried about leaving Remus before the change occurred. He had never heard of it happening when the sun was out. But what if Remus wasn't a normal werewolf?

James's next words sent those thoughts out the window. "Let's turn all the tables in the Great Hall red and gold!" 

Peter looked gleeful for a moment until Remus said, "We'll be given detention or worse if we get caught."

James grinned. Moony hadn't said they shouldn't do it, so he was definitely interested. He moved his gaze to Sirius, who was practically shaking with anticipation. "So we don't get caught. We'll wait until after you're recovered, then we'll sneak in like a bunch of marauders late at night."

"That will take some planning. Someone will have to keep the house elves away, and keep Peeves occupied so he doesn't tell a teacher." The werewolf's hazel eyes shone, but this time with interest. "We'll need your dad's cloak. And maybe a bath towel so Sirius can transfigure it into a curtain so nobody sees what we're doing by accident."

"We'll definitely be marauders if we pull it off." Sirius found a scroll so he could take a few notes on their ideas. Then he dutifully wrote them down with an intent that he rarely applied to his schoolwork. 

James nodded. "We are Marauders."

Remus accepted the name with an shift of his head. Sirius thought he saw the wolf flash in the boy's eyes a moment later. But Remus's smile never wavered. The wolf liked the name too. So he put his hand palm up on the middle of his trunk. "I swear I am a Marauder. I will steal out into the night to cause mischief and protect my fellow Marauders."

Remus laid his hand in the pale one on the trunk. "I solemnly swear that I am a Marauder and I will also cause mischief and protect the rest of you."

James and Peter piled their hands over the others and swore to do the same.

The four boys looked at each other with mischievous grins, then immediately returned to planning their first prank. Their breakfasts disappeared into their stomachs quickly. They needed the energy to work out the details.

Remus was shocked to find he had finished the two plates the elves had prepared for him even before he found the proper spell to change the color of the wood planks.

More importantly, if anybody had bothered to ask him, he would have sworn that he would find three familiar faces in the infirmary at some point the next day. He didn't know if they'd come with chocolate, his homework, or ideas for another prank. But he knew they would be there.

They swore on it. He was part of their new group. He didn't know what it was about the other boys in front of him, but they made it easy to trust them. Maybe it was the acceptance and the trust they seemed to have in him.

The wolf let Remus alone for the rest of that morning. Because it knew something that the boy didn't. It knew that the others would be just as accepting of it in the afternoon. It would have its time, even before the moon bathed the wolf in silvery light.


End file.
